Monday, 17 August 2015
Counting my blessings
In a month where a local family I know became homeless, a neighbour died, it rained and rained, we all caught colds - even the baby, I heard about two families who lost children in accidents, I felt lonely and claustrophobic at home alone with my children, I've felt uncomfortable in my post-baby body and annoyed I'm still in maternity wear, I've constantly slept on wet patches and smelt of puke every day for over 6 weeks, the dirt and mess in the house has stressed me out, the relentless neediness of my kids has had me cursing silently at them, tantrums, shouting and door slamming felt normal, the babies screams had me crying too as I tried to figure out what she needed, I felt totally unappreciated and pissed off for all the millions of invisible things I do for the household, I was bored on long days alone with the kids... I've decided to focus on the good and make a list of all that I'm thankful for.
I've two healthy children bouncing on the trampoline
I've a third healthy child sleeping in a chair beside me
I own this house
It was a sunny day today
We have gardens front and back
I'm having lovely days at home and out meeting good friends
I'm enjoying good health myself
I had a cup of tea in a neighbours house for the first time
My younger son made his first two friends on the road
Neighbours are still knocking on the door with presents
Friends are still bringing hot meals for us
Gifts are still arriving from family and friends
Family and friends are still helping out with the house and laundry
I got a new dress
I stopped and chatted with kind strangers admiring my baby
A lady in a cafe admired my breastfeeding for its handiness
Two (elderly but not blind) neighbours told me I look like a teenager
I'm seeing my waist sloooowly reappearing
I'm able for longer walks
I'm getting the hang of EC now, so less cloth nappies to wash and way less money on disposables
I've caught up with the laundry and the kitchen is clean
I've been told I'm a great mama by my son
I've had some lovely smiles from the baby
I have learned her signs for "boob", "wee", "poo", and "pick me up I'm gonna puke if you don't wind me"
There is less puke these days
I've learned her tired cry and can manage the "mad hour" which has become only a "mad ten minutes"
She is a little fatty
I have two ongoing projects for myself outside of my mothering role which keep me sane
I've discovered trashy tv and am watching the Kardashians...
My days and weeks finally have a rhythm and I'm no longer bored
I'm back cooking healthy meals and feeling the benefits
The fog has lifted now, 6 weeks after the birth I'm definitely out "the other side", the portal has closed and I'm settling into life with three children. Phew!